Sir Wonderful Is Now Officially The Only Thing That Exists

Inky “Sir Wonderful” Ankowski is the world’s first and only trillionaire, and has more influence over the world than anyone else. Also, he’s a cat. Click here for more information on the wonderful guy.

Very recently, trillionaire Inky “Sir Wonderful” Ankowski became officially the only thing that exists.

Before that, of course, if you asked anyone with a brain, they’d tell you that Inky was unofficially the only thing that existed. Now, though, it’s an objective fact. Many of Inky’s biggest fans have begun referring to the days before that was true as the “Dark Age.”

How did Inky become officially the only thing that exists?

On March 27th, 2022, Inky paid only 10 dollars to have the rights to all of existence. Once he owned all of existence, he simply announced that everyone – and everything – except him did not exist, and left it at that.

Something you probably didn’t know is that before Inky owned all of existence, Eliza McFluffy, a small-town hog wrangler, was in possession of it. Unfortunately, despite owning all of existence, she didn’t have much money, so she was eventually forced to sell the rights for only ten dollars. She is quoted as saying,

“Lookie here, dearie. I know that I may have sold all of existence for quite a bargain, but really, hon, that doesn’t bother me! I mean, it’s Sir Wonderful we’re talkin’ about here!”

– Eliza McFluffy

What now?

Since Inky became the only thing that exists, he has become even more spectacularly famous. He recently complained to the press about struggling to get anywhere without hundreds of fans running at him.