Since the beginning of time, it’s been obvious that some people are nitwits, and others aren’t. But unfortunately, sometimes it’s not so clear. Take this splendiferous quiz to find out (in exact percentages!!!) whether or not you are a nitwit.
Inky “Sir Wonderful” Ankowski, the world’s first trillionaire, has been on trial many times for stealing from his son, Smudge “The Pudge” Ankowski. Recently, Inky has told the press that not only is he very, very annoyed at having to be on trial, but he is hurt on a personal level, too. “I am wonderful,”…
Are you a poor, sad nitwit struggling with life? Although How To For Nitwits is making a gigantic, glorious, and mind blowing change to nitwits’ educations, there are still gaps that need to be filled. One of those gaps is learning how to move. “Moving is a difficult concept for nitwits and non-nitwits alike,” said…
The Best Way To Improve Brainpower Is Tacos: An Opinion Piece By Gilbert Ferdcyfull Have you ever noticed your brain is working a little bit slower than it should be? Don’t worry; it’s a common problem that many have. For that reason, tacos are the answer! Unfortunately, many have not heard of this wonderful cure…
Have you ever noticed the strange lights in the sky? The ones that come out only in the night? These lights have been dismissed for decades, but they could very well be the end of all of humanity. The fact is, these lights are a pressing issue facing humanity and all of life on Earth…
This day and age, it’s very easy to get distracted. Whether it’s something you’re reading, watching, or even making, you will almost always have something else on your mind. This can be a problem, but luckily there are many scientifically proven methods to be less distracted. I’m your reporter Ferdsy “Sorta Acceptable” Johnson, here to…
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Hello, amazing and dedicated viewers of howtofornitwits.com! Today it is Ferdsy “Sorta Acceptable” Johnson with your breaking news. In the giant-hotdog-sized metropolis of New York City, there is one sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad,…
Most people collect one thing or another – coins, stamps, or maybe something a little bit stranger. But Jellie Smith of Pennsylvania collects something, two somethings, that are much stranger than all the rest. “Beetles are beautiful,” Smith pronounced to an audience on February 12th, 2022. “They have a majestic beauty that no other creature…
On Tuesday, January 11, 2022, British archeologist Nigel Nigglebottom made an extraordinary discovery about nitwits and non-nitwits that will uncover a layer of history that we have not yet explored. And all because of his choice of location. Instead of heading for the legendary pyramids of Egypt or Kush or the elusive site of Mohenjodaro,…
